News From The Legal Frontline — Herman Cain’s New “Statistical Defense” For Sexual Harassment Claims
At the GOP debate on Tuesday night, CNBC’s Maria Bartiromo asked Herman Cain about the well-known sexual harassment claims swirling around his campaign and character like a river around a boulder. Like that boulder, unmovable, Cain answered, in part, and to applause:
“I value my character and my integrity more than anything else, and for every one person that comes forward with a false accusation – there are probably – there are thousands who would say, none of that sort of activity came from Herman Cain.”
Well, besides speaking in the 3rd person, media outlets far and wide consider this a weak, even shabby, defense, the “proportionality,” or “statistical” defense. . .
“Your Honor, my client presents the well-accepted proportionality defense. We ask that you take judicial notice of the clear fact that my client has robbed only a very very tiny proportion of the world population of banks and credit unions. Defense rests.”
I disagree with the critics of this defense, however. In fact, I love the idea. Often, it would have pulled my chestnuts out of the fire.
“Your Honor, think of the many times I did not exceed the speed limit by 45 miles per hour in that neighborhood, and that particular neighborhood is only one among millions of neighborhoods in this great country of ours, a country known for the fairness, in statistical terms, of its judicial system.”
But, I’m not running for President. (Yet)
Bill Clinton could have used it. “I did not have sexual relations with that woman” could have been expressed in this fashion,
“I did not have sexual relations with that woman, when one considers how many women there are in the world with whom I also could not have had sexual relations with either.”
End of story. If the proportion defense existed then, well, Bill Clinton would still be President of the United States, and Monica Lewinsky would be Chief of Staff (no pun intended, if viewed in light of the millions of puns I might have used. See?).
Newt Gingrich could employ it virtually every day of his life.
“I did not say what you just viewed on that video. Just consider for a moment just how many videos are out there where someone is not shown blatantly and outrageously straying from the exact truth. And what is the exact truth anyway? Was it when Bill Clinton said . . .”
You get the idea. He’s hopeless.
It would be a boon to Mitt Romney! Imagine this page in his campaign brochure.
Many have claimed that I am a “flip flopper,”
particularly on the issue of abortion.
However, in relative terms, my stance is as solid as Mount Rushmore.
Consider this:
there are literally thousands of positions, highly nuanced,
that I might take on the abortion issue.
I chose to take only eight:
 |
| “My fellow Americans, the Bureau of Justice Statistics of the Department of Justice has just informed me that, in statistical terms, I am not a crook.” |
So, if you ever think you’re not quite the best Dad or Mom in the world; if you sometimes claim a little more for charitable deductions than you should; if you consume three dozen glazed donuts in one sitting as a reward for doing so well during the first week of your diet, just remember this:
